Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Me.

I know I don't talk much about anything really on this blog. Mostly I just post pictures and every now and again if it strikes me, I may post something in text about my life. A blog is a funny thing. I've always been a journaler and have always kept a written account of what was going on in my life and my feelings. At least I did until a few years ago and then I stopped for the most part, I write maybe twice a year in my journal now. So this blog, this online journal. It's tricky because part of me wants to write very deep and personal things. Many times I have comprised posts of deep thoughts and feelings, only to delete them. I've debated on whether or not I wanted the world to know that much about me. And by the world, I mean the handful of you that take time to stroll over to the foshe family blog every now and again.

I've come to this conclusion: I want to tell you about my life. I have long said I was going to write a book someday. I actually started it 3 years ago. I didn't get very far, but there is a folder on my computer named "book" and in it is one document titled "Chapter 1." It's not even a complete "chapter" but I do have things started in my head at least. So now, I will use this blog as a draft for my someday "book."

So here it is, the 1st installment of my life's story.

I don’t remember the day, the month, or even the year that I realized my mother was a lesbian. Who wakes up and says, “Oh, I have heterosexual parents.” Nobody I knew and the same was true for me. I never woke up and said, “Oh, I have homosexual parents.” It’s just something you know, something that you somehow automatically without any discussion or education, just understand. What you don’t understand automatically is that it is not something that you should disclose to just anybody, this you learn only from experience.

I was saved when I was nine years old at Vacation Bible School. We lived on Montgomery Street, near, at the time, the only airport in our region. Tucked away in a corner, the old brick, three bedroom house sat at the end of the dead end street. A 1950’s something White Chevy pickup in the carport, next to the Honda Shadow motorcycle. In the back yard was the most beautiful oak tree you’d ever seen and around the bottom of it was a huge sand box, where my sister and I frequently spent our afternoons. There were times when you’d look back at that old tree and see one or two little girls’ bicycles hanging from some of the tallest branches. My sister and I frequently got our bikes taken away from us for various discipline problems. My mother’s way of reminding us of our misfortune was to hang the bikes just out of our reach in our back yard where we would see them every day until our time of punishment was over.

It is in this house that most of my childhood memories originate from. We moved around a lot and I tend to correlate a memory with wherever we lived at the time. Most of my memories correspond to this house. The house on Montgomery....

13 comments:

Jessica said...

Brandy, I am so proud of you for blogging about all of this! I am also so proud to be your friend. I like to feel, in some tiny, tiny way, that I helped you through some of those years. I love you, and can't wait to hear all you have to say! Will I be in the book? He, he, he? Pearl? : )

Abigail said...

Brandy, Thanks for contacting me. I am happy to add you to oversampled.net!

Welcome to Our Lives... said...

Thanks for sharing, Brandy. I know it took a lot of courage, but I hope it makes you feel better and get motivation for your book. I think it would be awesome to know someone (well, kind of) who wrote a book! I can't wait to hear more...

Anonymous said...

Brandy I knew we shared a kindred spirit...well if I believed in that sort of thing, but you know what I mean. I too aspire to write someday. I love your writing style. Your sentence structure is very clear and clean if that makes any sense. You want help, just hollar :+)
karen b.

Karen said...

What, I'm so sorry Brandy but I didn't put that anonymous comment on your blog. Not that I wouldn't, it just that I like to look at your pictures more that leave alittle comment. And anyone that knows me knows that I'm the worst person to go to for any help on putting together a book. Well at least on how to spell & punctuation. And they signed it Karen B.

Ashley Hester said...

more more more more more! You can't leave us hanging like that!!!

caseyfaye93 said...

Absolutely love it...your writing mesmorizes me...i have always loved hearing about what makes you, well you...give me more!

Brandy said...

Karen B(Jess's mom)...I work with a lady also named Karen B...she is the one who left the "anonymous" comment...she leaves them regularly, and that is how she signs them. Sorry, for the confusion, she's not trying to be you ;-) But I'm so glad you left me a comment and that you browse to my blog!! Come back...leave more comments! I love 'em!!!

Karen B. said...

Hey Brandy, I'm so sorry but I didn't even think that there would be someone else that has the name of Karen B. but I was sure wrong. Please forgive me. And I just love all of your photo's, your little girl is so cute. Sorry for the confusion.

The Holloway Family said...

I look forward to reading your blog book! We never really got to know each other in highschool so I feel like I missed out! We'll have to make up for that now!

Magevney said...

I would love to read a book by you, keep it going! :)

Anonymous said...

Hey I am sorry as well for the confusio. I will start signing my whole name. Karen Blackstone

Leah said...

After our emails back and forth, I started going back on your blog and reading. All I can say is WOW!!!! I don't really even know you, but I think you writing this is really cool. What a testimony to other people. I can't wait to read more...

Leah Smith